Peach-faced love bir Amazing World
sometimesquicklysometimesslowly: Photo by @briankaminski!
He was once immensely strong—in body, in mind, in purpose; in his belief of truths wound through his convictions—convictions he defended with such vehemence and, occasionally, such unbridled, merciless violence. His was a strength born of and nourished by the singularity of a mind not yet fractured by despicable compromise or untiring misplaced hope; not yet sequestered from reality for safekeeping, but held proudly aloft as a battle flag, an unfurling signal initiating the charge upon his waiting life; by dreams so immense they comprised a reality of his own making—a reality of pure, unrealized possibility in which he was immersed. Armored against fear, against self-doubt, against losses he could not yet conceive of—scaled so beautifully by unspoiled naiveté—he was as invincible as a fledgling god, if only in his own mind, and in his heart.
Oh, to be as he was. To be him!
To be him, once again.
I want to hear raucous music, to see faces, to brush against bodies, to drink fiery benedictine. Beautiful women and handsome men arouse fierce desires in me. I want to dance. I want drugs. I want to know perverse people, to be intimate with them. I never look at naive faces. I want to bite into life, and to be torn by it.
when words are not an option… learning to communicate again, without sighs, pleading or begging, no complaints or demands, no questions or comments. communicating more simply, more gracefully, silently. thinking whether it needs or must be communicated at all, or whether silence is all that is called for.
and then, the silent offer, always.
~ cat / be-pleasing-always
A skilled submissive can say so much without a word.
I write until my hands ache …
Because my soul aches …
Only to live in this time …
This time without words …
[Repost in response to an ask, because the original got hijacked and it is still relevant apparently.]
"When the slave/sub is ready….."
This ‘quote’ and the rest of it ‘the Master will appear’ are everywhere. I am not entirely sure who is responsible for the original adaptation to suit the D/s context. It is an adaptation, of a phrase seen in theosophy as ‘For when the disciple is ready, the Master is ready also’, and in the Buddhist proverb ‘when the student is ready, the teacher/master appears’.
It is an interesting thought, is it not? The slave/submissive sits and waits and when they are deemed ready the Master appears. And to be sure, as a Dom or Master to know or see your submissive or slave waiting for you is a sight for sore eyes.
Yet people are given this quote as advice when they ask about ways to find a Dom or Master, they are told a good slave practices patience. So apparently if a sub sits and waits patiently at home, a Dom or Master will as if by magic know they are waiting and appear out of thin air on their doorstep.
In some fantasy world this magic might work, the same one presumably where castles full of slaves patiently await the arrival of their Dom in shining armour. But down on earth, if a sub wants to find a Dom they will have to go out there and let people know they are waiting, make an effort, they will have to go out there and meet people, safely of course. And for a ‘good slave’ to practice patience for their Master, they will have to be someone’s slave first.
Certainly, the image of a sub or slave waiting for their Dom or Master is enticing, utterly beautiful and one to savour if you happen to be that Dom or Master. But we have to reach that stage first and unless we believe in magic or Batman-esque signals in the night sky, there is the very real and rather important matter of forging a relationship to deal with.
And the notion that the sub waits patiently for the Dom or Master to pick them, select them, find them, is the stuff of fiction and fantasy. Balderdash. In the real, physical world of D/s [yes it exists, trust me], people go out and find each other.
"Sir, I am ready and waiting for you" an anonymous person told me in my inbox and they were not the first. Apart from all other answers I might come up with and a heap of advice on safety and such, my main and very serious recommendation would have to be: “Don’t hold your breath." It doesn’t work that way.
The quote I began with may have merit in other situations, but it is useless as a piece of advice in terms of finding a partner for a D/s bond or anything else for that matter. Forging that bond takes time and very real effort from two people who have to find each other first. No amount of solitary patience or waiting will make it happen. No amount of fantasy will make it happen. In fact, it may be wise to let go of the fantasy, because it will pale in comparison to the real thing.
I want to take all of your air. Hold it hostage until I see honesty in your eyes. Affectations stripped away from you like so many clothes to slither off on the floor, ashamed and useless. I want to see the you under you, before you lathered on neurosis and insecurities. I want to see what colour desperation is on you.
It’s what you want, isn’t it? It’s the idea you flirt with, the one you flutter your eyelashes at, imagine when you lie in bed at night, hand planted between your legs, trying to make something grow. To be pushed, cajoled, urged towards the edge of… whatever it is, a purity of sorts.
So let’s take away the theatre. Dismiss the audience, sack the orchestra, and send all the other players home early. Dismantle the stage, until it’s just you and me on the wooden boarding, with nothing but each other left. Let’s hear you beg, let’s hear it without the moans, and the little inserted whimpers between every other word. Let’s hear the truth of it.
You say you want to be afraid, but I’m not sure you know what fear is, not really. There’s a wistfulness to your voice, as if its some whimsical idea that you can entertain of an afternoon, writhe around in until you get a sense of it without ever really brushing up against the reality. You say you want to be truly controlled, totally at my mercy, but I’m not sure you know what you’re saying.
Because I want metamorphosis. I want change, manifested in you, to watch the transformation from enjoyment to realisation to whatever is on the other side of that. I want you to leave different to when you arrived, take something on to carry with you. I want you to learn, but I don’t know what I want to teach. There’s a black hole between you and me, and I fear it’s sucking us both in. We’ll be crushed.
Hold a little back. Do it for me. Retain a little control, just a touch, a smidgen, enough that it can be a ripcord if you need it to be. Enough that you can pull me back from the brink, if I stare off that edge so long I start to look crazed. Look out for me, with the corner of your eye, and I’ll look out for you.
Quid pro quo, Clarice.
What remained when the curtain fell …
Wild eyes and a wicked smile …
Ah but this is purity …
In its most natural of states …
Colour me black or neon red …
It’s all the same you see …
On a desperate canvas …
I’ve got more than a smidgen …
If you really want it …
Do you really want it?
Or I can save us both the trouble …
Quid pro quo …
"He dug so deeply into her sentiments that in search of interest he found love, because by trying to make her love him he ended up falling in love with her. Petra Cotes, for her part, loved him more and more as she felt his love increasing, and that was how in the ripeness of autumn she began to believe once more in the youthful superstition that poverty was the servitude of love. Both looked back then on the wild revelry, the gaudy wealth, and the unbridled fornication as an annoyance and they lamented that it had cost them so much of their lives to find the paradise of shared solitude. Madly in love after so many years of sterile complicity, they enjoyed the miracle of living each other as much at the table as in bed, and they grew to be so happy that even when they were two worn-out people they kept on blooming like little children and playing together like dogs."
— Gabriel García Márquez (One Hundred Years of Solitude)